She digs her weak hands
into the warm sand to reach
the cool dampness beneath.

For some minutes
she closes her eyes and breathes calmly,
feeling everything she can feel,
absorbing the melody hidden in life.

As the wind plays with her hair,
a million thoughts dart her mind:
she didn't want to think.
She was there to embrace that moment,
to be a dream being again.

Determined to pretend chemotherapy
was nothing but a simple word consigned to oblivion,
she opens her eyes, looking for shells and crabs
in the sand.

Her husband is right behind her.
( she knew what they have would outlive life)
Weird thing to realise love
when you are dying.

She observes the clouds formation,
feeling a tremendous gratitude holding her heart,
carrying her away to a different kind of paradise.
She doesn't know if she will ever come back
to that beach and see the seagulls one more time.
Tomorrow is only tomorrow.
But right now she is still here, struggling, challeging fate,
triumphing over what she can't control
and it is enough.

Karla Bardanza

For P.J

Copyright©Karla Bardanza 2011

1 comment:

  1. Most people ready to cross over with a termianl illness have a revelation of eternity and love; one that most of us cannot grasp or feel. This is a beautiful tribute to your friend. Loving and powerful. It also shows your heart of caring. Blessings ~ flower